Cordyceps Essence: Sensitivity + Transformation
Cordyceps is a large genus of fungi, many of which are parasitic, mostly infecting insects and arthropods. Cordyceps militaris and Cordyceps sinensis are the two main medicinal species used. As a mushroom essence, Robert Rogers writes;
“Cordyceps mushroom essence assists us on our soulful journey into the unknown (…) Cordyceps individuals may appear fragile or extremely sensitive to others, or they may feel judged by other people (…) the mushroom essence may be helpful to those who react to, or reject, the impact of industry on their lives. On one level, this may manifest as allergies or sensitivity to environmental pollution, electromagnetic radiation, and so on… These highly sensitive people are the canary in the coal mine (…)”
~ Robert Rogers, “Mushroom Essences: Vibrational Healing from the Kingdom Fungi”
This essence contains other aspects and elements, however this synopsis was what inspired me to begin working with cordyceps mushroom essence. I am a highly sensitive person, with many allergies (predominantly food), and am negatively affected by being around too much technology. I also fear death and experience anxiety during changes/transformations and was curious to see how cordyceps might alter my perceptions.
The first week of taking 2 drops of essence a day, I experienced brain fog which was difficult to endure but I felt it was likely a temporary effect of starting this medicine. It slackened off, however I also experienced intermittent intense dreams/nightmares throughout the first two weeks.
I’m not sure if I recorded my dreams at this earlier stage in the process, however I would wake with a thumping heart and fear running through my veins. Once my subconscious purged itself of the shadows that I had not been acknowledging, without any effort on my part, my dreams became more vivid and responsive to my pre-bedtime questions. One night I asked to dream about becoming more comfortable with death and experienced the following dream;
My sisters and I were going to a spa with my grandma even though we knew she was on the brink of passing away. We got seperated and she died during this time. My eldest sister came to me and told me, and she then went and greeted the condolence-wishers and gift-givers. Later I was at a party and my grandma was there again, looking more full and alive than she had been in a long time. She was pulling a sweater over her head and then gave me a smile that conveyed love and concern- that I shouldn’t be worried about her.
This dream reminded me of the Life/Death/Life cycle, and that in death there are the seeds of transformation and new life. The sweater symbolically represented the “threads of life”, rewoven and covering her anew.
After about two weeks my stomach started to feel less bloated and gassy. I began noticing less food sensitivities which I was so happy about!
I ended up meeting friends for Ethiopian food and the restaurant did not have a gluten free injera, so I decided to go for it, I felt brave! The gluten plus legumes could really have made my stomach turn into a tight fist on another day but overall my belly was pretty good!
For about a week and a half I experienced strong (for me) digestion and then had a set back. Was it just the cabbage and carrots? Or was it due to feeling insecure and unable to fully speak my mind that set it off?
I felt so downcast the following day as my belly continued to ache. Flower essences were a big support as I navigated frustration at the set back (impatiens and gentian), insecurity (larch), and self-pity (chicory). I took drops as the day went on and as my mood shifted. Setbacks like this can set my mind to racing, doubting what I’m doing as ineffective and feeling like I’ll “never” heal. With the support of the flowers I felt more grounded, able to see that this wasn’t the end of the world, and open a door in my mind to the possibility that my body wanted to communicate something else with me, something I hadn’t quite tuned into yet.
My journey of healing my belly continues, however cordyceps essence has already positively influenced my body, emotions, spirit, and soul.
UPDATE: 3 MONTHS LATER
Since working with cordyceps, I no longer experience chronic abdominal pain! I still have food sensitivities, however I no longer experience nearly daily abdominal pain, bloating, and discomfort.